The 2024 Gulfman Fantasy Football League is officially over. And to no one’s surprise, Je Ne Saquon are the champs. Congratulations to Walker! His fake team comprised of, dare I say, stud running backs was the one to beat from the jump. Barkley, Kamara, Irving, and when it mattered most, Jonathan Taylor, sledgehammered their collective way to a title that was never really in doubt.
While Walker celebrates with Brazilian hookers and Colombian blow (allegedly), the rest of us must settle for consolation prizes or concoct a Hawk Tuah Girl pump-and-dump crypto scam to pay for entry fees. Either way, we have 8 months to lick our wounds and devise plots and schemes to usurp the king.
For example, I think Woody Johnson’s ingenious “Madden” system is the way to go. Who needs washed-up fantasy experts, annoying analytic nerds, and grizzled ball-knowers to draft guys when you can rely on the player rating system from a video game franchise that peaked 20 years ago? All these fools clowning on Woody are just jealous of his psychotic unorthodox leadership skills.
I leave you with this joyful display of incompetency brought to you by none other than the New York Football Giants.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!
Until next season…
Stud Running Back 